5 Realistic Rules for Better Sleep

By Nancy Gottesman

You have to live in dreamland if you want a good night's sleep, according to the usual expert advice: Make your bedroom into a spalike sanctuary. Don't drink a drop of caffeine after 2 p.m. No laptops in the bedroom. So we were shocked when sleep doctor Michael Breus, PhD, admitted that he drifts off with the TV on and his Chihuahua, Sparky, and cat, Monte, in the bed -- two major no-nos. His refreshing philosophy: "Steer clear of all the hard-and-fast rules and do what makes sense for your lifestyle." That we can handle. Read on for more surprising sleep tips that mere mortals like us can actually follow.

Sleep in on weekends. 
Forget all the blah-blah about maintaining a consistent wakeup time every day. Snoozing late on the weekend can have real benefits. Adults who were sleep deprived for five days (sound like your workweek?) made up for it somewhat -- bouncing back closer to their baseline brain function and alertness -- when they clocked 10 hours the next night, a study in the journal Sleep found. Still, it's best to snooze only an extra hour or two come Saturday and Sunday. "Any more than that will reset your body clock, and then you won't be able to fall asleep on Sunday night," says Carol E. Ash, a sleep specialist in Monmouth County, New Jersey. If the additional winks aren't enough to make you feel rested, take a 20-minute nap at 3 or 4 p.m. on the weekend, which won't mess with your internal timetable, Ash says.

Exercise before bed -- it's OK, really!
Working out after dinner has long been considered a don't by sleep docs. But -- surprise! -- it may actually help you snooze better. Young adults who rode a stationary bike for about 35 minutes, finishing two hours before bedtime, conked out faster and slept more deeply than when they didn't exercise, a recent study in the Journal of Sleep Research found. If you discover you're too revved up to go to bed after a nighttime sweat session, keep a weekly log of your exercise time and how you sleep afterward, advises Lisa Shives, MD, the founder of Northshore Sleep and Weight Management Medicine in Evanston, Illinois, and a medical expert for SleepBetter.org. You may learn that a treadmill jog within an hour of hitting the hay is disastrous for dozing, but that doing it two to three hours beforehand makes you sleep like a baby. Exercise, whenever you can get it, is one of the best sleep medicines, period, Dr. Shives says.

Snuggle with Fluffy. 
Feel lonely? If you do, you're likely to wake up more often during the night, a University of Chicago study found. Consider picking up a new bedmate...at your local animal rescue society. "I tell my patients who don't like sleeping alone to consider getting a dog," Dr. Shives says. A pet helps many women feel less isolated, which can restore sound sleep. It's fine to break the no-pets-in-bed rule even when you're not lonely, especially if keeping your furry friend out creates more disruption than letting him in. "If I banned my cat from the bedroom, he would paw at the door all night long, and I would get even less sleep," says Breus, the author of The Sleep Doctor's Diet Plan: Lose Weight Through Better Sleep.

Play a bedtime story. 
The next time you wake up in the middle of the night and can't fall back to sleep, ignore the prevailing wisdom about getting out of bed to read by dim light. Dr. Shives recommends a new strategy: Quiet your churning mind with an audiobook, preloaded on your phone or music player and at the ready, bedside. Plug in your earbuds, press "Play," and cover the display to block the glow. The story shouldn't be too stimulating, so choose a biography or your favorite book from childhood instead of, say, Fifty Shades of Grey. In 15 to 20 minutes the narrative should soothe you to sleep, Dr. Shives says. If TV has always been a snoozing aid for you, follow Breus's trick: Use a TV with a sleep timer and set it to switch off after 30 minutes.

Think before you drink. 
It's generally a good idea to cut out coffee, soda, and energy drinks seven to eight hours before bedtime. But the half-life of caffeine affects everyone differently.  Also be aware that a nightcap can be as disastrous for your slumber as an after-dinner cappuccino. Under the influence, you snooze in seconds. Problem is, you'll wake up four or five hours later. And healthy women are much more susceptible to the "sleepus interruptus" effects of overimbibing, according to a recent University of Michigan study. "The best rule: Have your last drink three hours before you turn in," Breus says.

Paleo Diet

Pronunciation Poem

If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.

Use http://www.howjsay.com/ A free online Talking Dictionary of English Pronunciation.

Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it’s written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.
Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.
And your pronunciation’s OK
When you correctly say croquet,
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
Friend and fiend, alive and live.
Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.
River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
Doll and roll and some and home.
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.
Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
And then singer, ginger, linger,
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.
Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.
Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.
Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Feoffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
Dull, bull, and George ate late.
Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
Science, conscience, scientific.
Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
We say hallowed, but allowed,
People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
Mark the differences, moreover,
Between mover, cover, clover;
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
Chalice, but police and lice;
Camel, constable, unstable,
Principle, disciple, label.
Petal, panel, and canal,
Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator, spectator, mayor.
Tour, but our and succour, four.
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Sea, idea, Korea, area,
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
Say aver, but ever, fever,
Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
Heron, granary, canary.
Crevice and device and aerie.
Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.
Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.
Pronunciation (think of Psyche!)
Is a paling stout and spikey?
Won’t it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?
It’s a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewife, verdict and indict.
Finally, which rhymes with enough,
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?
Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give up!!!

English Pronunciation by G. Nolst Trenité

Hagdan

Araw-araw ay kabaliktaran ang swerte

Mukha lang inosente pero pwede mag rebelde

Ginagawa kong kapre ang bawat mga dwende

Kung minsan ang kulay pulay ginagawa kong berde

Nakasagutan ko si nanay

Si utol nakaaway

Hindi na ko umuuwi ng bahay

Nagpunta sa kapitbahay,

Nakitulog, nakitambay

Naki-uso, nakibagay

Naki-usok, nakitagay

Pinakain ko ng damo ang pulang kabayo

Paulit-ulit lang umaasang may magbabago

Binusog ko lang lalo ang ari kong pagkatao

Pagnagtalo yung dalawang aso, yung mabuti yung talo

Napalayo sa riyalidad

Naglalakad ako ngunit akala ko ako’y lumilipad

Naging tamang hinala

Panay maling akala

Hinahabol ko ang tama

At mukhang mali na ata

Gusto kong maglayag

Gusto kong mga pangarap ko, mangyari agad

Gusto kong lumangoy

Gusto kong lumipad
Pakiramdam ko kaya kong gawin ang lahat

Teka, wag kang magmadali

Dahan-dahan lang (dahan-dahan lang)

Tayo ay para lang humahakbang paakyat ng hagdan

Ang kalaban ko ay nasa likod nakangiti

May inaalok siya sakin, di ako makahindi

Di sila nakaitim bagkos nakaputi

Nung ako’y nakatikim hindi na ko umuwi

Sa aking tunay na buhay

Humaba lang ang sungay

Ang patunay, tunay ang lakad ko ay pasuray-suray

Ako ay uminom ng lason kahapon

Umaasang yung taong yon ang nasa kabaong

At ako’y ay nilamon ng buhawi

Inanod ng ugali kong ‘sing baho ng pusali

Sa sobrang bangis nagawa nila akong itali

Ang buhay ay tungkol sa kung papano ka bumangon at bumawe

Sa aking pagbalik sa liwanag ay nasilaw

Nasanay sa silid na laging patay ang ilaw

At kahit na nasasabon, wag na wag kang tatalon

Sa bawat bagyo tandaan laging may pag-asa Ron

Gusto kong maglayag

Gusto kong mga pangarap ko, mangyari agad

Gusto kong lumangoy

Gusto kong lumipad

Pakiramdam ko kaya kong gawin ang lahat

Teka, wag kang magmadali

Dahan-dahan lang (dahan-dahan lang)

Tayo ay para lang humahakbang paakyat ng hagdan

May araw na malas, may araw ring swerte

Tanggap ko nang pula’y hindi pwede maging berde

Hindi madali pero posible

Kung ang lahat ng bagay ay gagawin kong simple

May mga taong inilagay para ako’y itumba

Isang kalabit nalang at ako’y puputok na

Ganto ata talaga kapag ang puno ay mabunga

Binabato-bato ng may mahulog at makuha

Sa aking kahinaan ay naging malakas

Lalo akong tumingin paloob imbis palabas

Isinapuso ko di ako masyadong nag-isip

Ng kung ano-ano lalo ko lang niyakap ang inip

At ako ay nagpasakop sa programa

Sa tulong ng aking mga bagong kasama

Ako ay nakabangon sa kama

Muli kong nasilayan ang isang bagong umaga

Gusto kong maglayag

Gusto kong mga pangarap ko, mangyari agad

Gusto kong lumangoy

Gusto kong lumipad

Pakiramdam ko kaya kong gawin ang lahat

Teka, wag kang magmadali

Dahan-dahan lang (dahan-dahan lang)

Tayo ay para lang humahakbang paakyat ng hagdan

Gusto kong maglayag

Gusto kong mga pangarap ko, mangyari agad

Gusto kong lumangoy

Gusto kong lumipad

Pakiramdam ko kaya kong gawin ang lahat

Teka, wag kang magmadali

Dahan-dahan lang (dahan-dahan lang)

Tayo ay para lang humahakbang paakyat ng hagdan

***

LIFE is NOW

***

Malayang Pag-uusap

Tayong dalawa ay nadanasan masaktan
ng sakit sa puso't damdamin.
Mapapatawad ang pagkakamali
pero ang malubhang sugat ay matagal maghilom.

Dahil sa sakit-loob,
ang pag-uusap ay guardiado
ayaw masaktan muli o makasakit pa.

Sa sobrang ingat
ang taos pusong pag-uusap ay naglalaho,
nawalan ng unawaan o tiwalang maunawaan.

Madalas sa kawala ng pasensiosong pang-unawa,
resulta ay awayan at dagdag na galit't sakit sa puso.

Nawala ang resonableng pag-iisip sa awayan
at nagmimistulang hayop, laban o takbo.
Sarili lang ang impotante, manalo o isalba.

Kapag napuno ng sakit ang looban,
sa galit nauuwi ang usapan.
Panalo ba mas malakas sumigaw?
Panalo ba ang nag-salita ng mas masakit?
Walang panalo sa mag-asawang pinag-isa,
at talo ang lahat sa pamilya

Mahirap pag-usapan ang mahalaga at malalim,
mga paksang buhay magasawa.
Kung walang bigayan at makasarili
kung walang unawa at dudang maunawaan.

***

Human Economics

Routine, not-so-interesting jobs require direction. 

Non-routine, more interesting work depends on self-direction. 

Extrinsic Motivators
Extrinsic motivation comes from outside of the individual. Common extrinsic motivations are rewards like money and grades, and threat of punishment. Competition is in general extrinsic because it encourages the performer to win and beat others, not simply to enjoy the intrinsic rewards of the activity. A crowd cheering on the individual and trophies are also extrinsic incentives. The concept of motivation can be instilled in children at a very young age, by promoting and evoking interest in a certain book or novel. The idea is to have a discussion pertaining the book with young individuals, as well as to reward them.

Intrinsic Motivators
Intrinsic motivation refers to motivation that is driven by an interest or enjoyment in the task itself, and exists within the individual rather than relying on any external pressure. Intrinsic motivation is based on taking pleasure in an activity rather than working towards an external reward.

Students who are intrinsically motivated are more likely to engage in the task willingly as well as work to improve their skills, which will increase their capabilities. Students are likely to be intrinsically motivated if they:

• Attribute their educational results to factors under their own control, also known as autonomy. 
• Believe they have the skill that will allow them to be effective agents in reaching desired goals. 
• Are interested in mastering a topic, rather than just rote-learning to achieve good grades. 

Algorithmic Tasks
An algorithmic task is one in which you follow a set of established instructions down a single pathway to one conclusion. Algorithmic jobs therefore are ones where the same task is done over and over. Algorithmic jobs are becoming easier to replace with technology or done with cheaper manpower.

Heuristic Tasks
A heuristic task involves trial and error and discovering the solution by yourself. Heuristic jobs involve creativity and doing something new often. Heuristic jobs; especially those that involve personal contact, creativity and problem-solving; are more difficult to replace with technology.

We humans are intrinsically motivated purpose maximizers and not only extrinsically motivated profit maximizers.

“Artists who pursued their painting and sculpture more for the pleasure of the activity itself than for extrinsic rewards have produced art that has been socially recognized as superior. Persons who are least motivated to pursue extrinsic rewards who eventually receive them.”

“What is true is that mixing rewards with inherently interesting, creative, or noble tasks—deploying them without understanding the peculiar science of motivation—is a very dangerous game. By neglecting the ingredients of genuine motivation—autonomy, mastery, and purpose—they limit what each of us can achieve.”

“Goals may cause systematic problems for organizations due to narrowed focus, unethical behavior, increased risk taking, decreased cooperation, and decreased intrinsic motivation. Use care when applying goals in your organization.”

Seven Deadly Flaws of Rewards and Punishments

1. They can extinguish intrinsic motivation. 
2. They can diminish performance. 
3. They can crush creativity. They can crowd out good behavior. 
4. They can encourage cheating, shortcuts, and unethical behavior. 
5. They can become addictive. 
6. They can foster short-term thinking.

Effectiveness of Rewards and Punishments On Algorithmic Tasks

“Rewards do not undermine people’s intrinsic motivation for dull, non-cognitive mechanical tasks because there is little or no intrinsic motivation to be undermined.”

Offer a rationale for why the task is necessary.
A job that’s not inherently interesting can become more meaningful, and therefore more engaging, if it’s part of a larger purpose. Explain why the task is so important and why the task's completion is critical to your organization’s mission.

Acknowledge that the task is boring.
This is an act of empathy, of course. And the acknowledgment will help people understand why this is the rare instance when “if-then” rewards are part of how your organization operates.

Allow people to complete the task their own way.
Think autonomy, not control. State the outcome you need. But instead of specifying precisely the way to reach the outcome; give them freedom over how they do the job.

***

The Prayer

The Prayer

I pray you'll be our eyes, and watch us where we go.
And help us to be wise in times when we don't know
Let this be our prayer, when we lose our way
Lead us to the place, guide us with your grace
To a place where we'll be safe

La luce che tu hai
I pray we'll find your light
nel cuore restera
and hold it in our hearts.
a ricordarci che
When stars go out each night,
eterna stella sei

The light you have 
I pray we'll find your light 
will be in the heart 
and hold it in our hearts. 
to remember us that 
When stars go out each night, 
you are eternal star
Nella mia preghiera
Let this be our prayer
quanta fede c'e
when shadows fill our day

How much faith there's 
Let this be our prayer 
in my prayer 
when shadows fill our day
Lead us to a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe

Sognamo un mondo senza piu violenza
un mondo di giustizia e di speranza
Ognuno dia la mano al suo vicino
Simbolo di pace, di fraternita

We dream a world without violence 
a world of justice and faith. 
Everyone gives the hand to his neighbours 
Symbol of peace, of fraternity
La forza che ci da
We ask that life be kind
e il desiderio che
and watch us from above
ognuno trovi amor
We hope each soul will find
intorno e dentro se
another soul to love

The force his gives us 
We ask that life be kind 
is wish that 
and watch us from above 
everyone finds love 
We hope each soul will find 
around and inside 
another soul to love
Let this be our prayer
Let this be our prayer, just like every child

Need to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
Need to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe

E la fede che
hai acceso in noi,
sento che ci salvera

It's the faith 
you light in us 
I feel it will save us